Mister Jalopy’s BLAST FROM THE FUTURE!

If Snap-On doesn’t want to sell to amateurs, somebody else will.

•If a department-store screwdriver has a lifetime warranty, why would you ever spend 10 times as much on a prestige brand? After all, if the screwdriver breaks and it is replaced for free, then it’s the last screwdriver you’ll ever have to buy, assuming you plan to live just a single lifetime.

As a tool snob, I will argue the case for exquisite hand tools for as long as the beer holds out. I will defend the superior finish and perfect balance of professional-grade tools for the entirety of an Elks Lodge all-you-can-eat spaghetti dinner, and will make my closing arguments only after the spumoni has been eaten and the carafe of burgundy has been drained. When the crickets stop chirping and the sun begins to rise, I will stress the importance of knowing that the tool in hand is at least as reliable as the mechanic using it. And as our friendship is strained to the brink and you have long abandoned your dedication to the dime-store screwdriver, I will wish you no harm and hope that you forever avoid the despair of breaking a 2" ratchet at Yellowstone National

Park. With a hailstorm approaching, the buffalo are not likely to lend you one of theirs.

My grandfather, father, and stepfather all relied on Snap-On tools, but my dedication to fine hand tools is not based on blind dedication to a brand. With the precision of surgical instruments, Snap-On continues to engineer tools that immediately feel as if you have been using them for your entire life.

However, since I am not a professional mechanic, I no longer buy Snap-On tools. Sure, they will sell to us amateurs through the Snap-On website, but we are not extended the same warranty that professional mechanics enjoy.

Nonprofessionals are required to send a letter to Snap-On describing planned purchases and then wait for a reply for nonprofessional warranty information. And, if the tool breaks, there is no practical path for repair, as that is handled by the Snap-On franchisees. Try calling a franchisee and tell them you need a tool repaired that you purchased from their website. With a warranty that can’t be used, Snap-On has made it clear that they are not interested