your favorite pencil.

Embroidery skeins come 6 threads thick. You start by cutting off a piece about as long as your arm, and then separate it in 2, so each length is only 3 threads thick. This stuff costs pennies and lasts a long time! Thread your embroidery needle (or any needle with a long eye) and run the floss rudely along a piece of beeswax, such as a candle, so the threads don’t twist and knot up.

POCKETS

You may have already stolen a garment from your beloved’s drawers that has a cute pocket to decorate. Great, just stick it in your hoop and begin.

But what about adding a pocket? It’s subversive, utilitarian fun. Don’t bother matching — the sillier and more stark the contrast, the better.

There is only one sane way to cut out a strong,
non-droopy pocket for any purpose. Ignore the crap
instructions you’ve seen on commercial patterns!

Illustration by Tramaine de Senna

For each single pocket you want, cut out 2 identical pieces, on the grain. Leave at least a 3" seam allowance.

If you want to get excellent pocket templates, buy the Kwik Sew 2861 hospital scrubs pattern, which provides you perfect tissues for the breast pocket, for the cellphone on the side, for putting tools in your smock, and so on. These shapes have been tested for utility! (Make a pair of scrubs while you’re at it. They’re the ultimate “do-everything and then sleep-in-’em” outfit.)

Inscribe and embroider one of the pocket pieces as you did with the hankie. You might want to start with extra-huge seam allowances, so as to hoop your fabric tightly. You can cut down the pocket once you’ve finished your embroidery and seen how it looks.

Now grab the other twin piece, and finish your pocket: place right sides kissing, and stitch them together, except for a 2" gap at the bottom. Trim the corners. Turn the pocket right side out, and poke out the corners crisply with a point turner.

Curl under those raw edges from where you left the peephole and press the pocket so it looks perfect. Don’t stitch the gap closed yet — just place the pocket on your garment where you want it, and then edge-stitch the whole double layer down. Voilà!

My Daddy carried in his trousers the handkerchief I embroidered for him. My ex of some 20 years still wears the red shirt every winter that I embroidered with the word “Bunny” and a little green fir tree. My daughter will never give up the overalls that say “Boo” on the bib. When it comes to name-calling, the sweeter and stickier, the more beloved the cloth. “Susie, Baby, You Rip!” is what I’d like to wake up to on my Valentine pillow! ×

 

» About embroidery hoops: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ embroidery_hoop

» How to backstitch: craftzine.com/go/backstitch » Hand embroidery floss: coatsandclark.com/

products/hand+embroidery » Kwik Sew 2861 pattern: craftzine.com/go/ks2861